Lateral Projects

18/08/2026

🚨 LATERAL PROJECTS HAS ROOM FOR NEW JOBS! 🚨

Somehow, against all odds, the boys have finished enough jobs that we can actually say the words…

“Yep, we can fit you in.” 😂🔨

So if you’ve been staring at that dodgy deck, tired bathroom, leaning fence or retaining wall that looks like it’s one decent storm away from becoming your neighbour’s problem — now’s the time.

We’re taking bookings for:

🔨 Decks & verandahs
🚿 Bathroom & laundry renovations
🏡 Renovations & repairs
🪚 Fences & gates
🧱 Retaining walls
🎨 Painting & plastering
🛠️ Carpentry & general building works
🌿 Landscaping
…and all the other weird and wonderful jobs that start with “While you’re here, can you just…” 😅

Big jobs. Small jobs. Annoying jobs you’ve been putting off for three years.

Lateral Projects — Plan. Design. Build.
Servicing East Gippsland and surrounds.

📩 Flick us a message for a free quote before we accidentally get busy again.

And yes… tag your mate whose deck moves more than their knees do after a few beers. 🍻😂

02/06/2026

🌱 WANTED: One Set of Hands for Tomorrow in Metung 🌱

Before anyone gets too excited, we’re not building the Sydney Harbour Bridge.

We need someone to help lay turf tomorrow.

Requirements:
✅ Can lift a roll of turf without filing a workers comp claim.
✅ Doesn’t mind getting a bit dirty.
✅ Can tell the difference between grass and the ground it goes on.
✅ Available tomorrow.

What you’ll get:
💰 Paid for your efforts.
☕ Smoko supplied.
😂 A day of questionable banter from the Lateral crew.
🌱 The satisfaction of turning a patch of dirt into something respectable.

If you’re keen, flick us a message.

Tag that mate who’s always saying “if you need a hand, let me know” … well, tomorrow’s their chance.

28/05/2026

We’re starting to realise there are two types of clients…

1. People who hire builders based on experience, reputation and quality of work.
2. People who see our Facebook posts and think:
“Yep. Those unstable idiots are exactly who I want renovating my house.”

And honestly… we respect both equally.

Somehow, between the questionable humour, onsite carry-on, roasting each other publicly, and whatever species of content Rhino and H have become this week… people still ring us and say:
“Loved your post. Can you quote my deck/pergola/extension?”

Which either means:
A) our marketing works brilliantly, or
😎 Gippsland has completely lowered its standards.

Either way, we appreciate every client who backs us. Underneath the chaos, there’s actually a bloody good crew that takes pride in the work.

The page may look like a travelling circus…
…but the builds speak for themselves.

02/05/2026

Ah, you can almost hear the soft murmur of the gallery and the gentle rustle of the breeze across the fairway…

“Well now… this is rather lovely, isn’t it. A fine morning, a well-kept course, and a couple of Lateral lads stepping away from the tools and onto the turf. Not a bad office, I must say.

You’ll notice the relaxed posture… no rush here. This isn’t about deadlines or defect lists—this is about connection. A quiet word with the client, a shared laugh, perhaps a subtle reminder that business is often done best between swings rather than spreadsheets.

And look at that… a smooth, confident strike. Not textbook, perhaps—but effective. Much like their work, I imagine.

Yes… a couple of the boys out for a hit with a customer this morning. Building relationships the old-fashioned way—one fairway at a time.

Quite right too.”

02/05/2026

🏡 WELCOME TO OUR LATEST LAND RELEASE – 5 LAWRIEL COURT, KALIMNA 🌿

Opportunities like this don’t come along often… and when they do, they don’t last long.

We’re proud to present 6 new lots at 5 Lawriel Court, Kalimna – premium parcels in a boutique subdivision, perfectly positioned to build your dream home or secure a smart investment.

✨ Elevated position
✨ Peaceful, private setting
✨ Surrounded by quality homes
✨ Minutes to Lakes Entrance, shops, schools & the water

Whether you’re looking to build your forever home, a coastal getaway, or lock in land in a tightly held area – this ticks all the boxes.

📍 Kalimna – where lifestyle meets location.

👉 Check out all the details here:
https://www.realestate.com.au/property-residential+land-vic-kalimna-204478340?campaignType=external&campaignChannel=other&campaignSource=share_link&campaignName=share_link

📞 Get in quick – blocks like this don’t sit around for long.

Positioned in a quiet Kalimna court just minutes from Lakes Entrance, Lot 3 / 5 Lawriel Court offers a rare opportunity to secure a generous 1,079m² residential allotment in a tightly held coastal pocket. With extra space to work with, this block is ideal for building your dream home, holiday retre...

01/05/2026

Big night in Bairnsdale 🔥

We’re proud to be sponsoring the Bairnsdale Production Line Theatre Co. inc as they hit the stage tonight for opening night at The Forge Theatre.

If you haven’t already locked in tickets, do yourself a favour—this crew is seriously talented. Shows are running over the next three weekends, so there’s no excuse not to get along and support some incredible local performers.

Massive effort from everyone involved 👏
Go on… swap the couch for a night out and see what Bairnsdale can really do.

29/04/2026

Somewhere in the wilds of Gippsland… three rare species have been spotted working in perfect (and slightly questionable) harmony.

H – the Welsh wizard of carpentry. Seen here high above ground level, casting spells on roof trusses and muttering ancient incantations like “she’ll be right” and “where’s my bloody nail gun.”

Rangi – the framing machine. Part man, part Afro, all business. Moves steel like it’s matchsticks and keeps the whole structure honest… or at least standing.

And Cam – the apprentice. Young, keen, and still hasn’t worked out that volunteering to “just grab that” turns into 47 trips back and forth across site.

Together, this motley crew have taken a slab and turned it into something resembling a house… with only minor chaos, a few lost tools, and at least one argument about who left the screws in the wrong spot.

If your place needs framing, roofing, or just a bit of organised madness…

You know who to call. 👷‍♂️

JG King Homes

28/04/2026

🚧 NEED A NEW FENCE? 🚧

You could try doing it yourself…
Couple of YouTube videos, a dodgy post hole digger, and a weekend that turns into a 6-week domestic dispute…

OR…

You could call in the professionals who actually know which end of the spirit level is up.

At Lateral Projects, our Outdoor Crew (led by Rhino 🦏 and Jase) don’t just build fences…
They build “how good does that look, mate?” fences.

✔ Straight lines (not “she’ll be right” lines)
✔ Solid posts (that won’t wobble in a stiff breeze)
✔ Gates that actually open… and close… revolutionary, we know

Whether it’s keeping the dog in, the neighbours out, or just making your place look schmick — we’ve got you covered.

📞 Get Lateral Projects onto it before your old fence falls over and takes your dignity with it.

27/04/2026

Right. Gather round.

Out there… beyond the comfort of your freshly mowed lawn and your poorly aligned Bunnings Warehouse Australia pavers… live two specimens rarely seen in the wild.

Jase. And the Rhino.

The Rhino… a creature of raw power and questionable subtlety. Known to charge headfirst into retaining walls, fences, and anything else that dares stand slightly off-level. Scientists believe he can smell an un-square post from up to 3 kilometres away.

And Jase… the apprentice turned weapon. Quiet. Observant. Learning the ancient arts of levels, lines, and “that’ll be right” adjustments — all under the watchful, slightly unhinged guidance of the Rhino.

Together, they roam the suburbs of Gippsland, transforming sad, neglected backyards into something that won’t get judged at your next BBQ.

Fences that actually line up.
Retaining walls that stay… retained.
Decks you’ll pretend you built yourself.
Pergolas that scream “I’ve made it.”
Automated gates for when you want to feel just a little bit superior to your neighbours.

They don’t ask for much.
Just access, a bit of space… and the occasional Dare Iced Coffee sacrifice.

So if your yard currently looks like a crime scene — or worse, a DIY attempt gone horribly wrong — you know who to call.

Lateral Projects Outdoor Crew.
Jase & Rhino.

Nature is healing. Your backyard can too.

24/04/2026

Here, on the quiet edge of suburbia, we observe a curious and industrious creature… newly introduced to its environment.

Behold — the compact excavator.

At first glance, it appears still. Dormant. But do not be deceived. Within its steel frame lies immense potential. Its articulated arm, poised with precision, moves with a deliberate grace — a mechanical extension evolved not over millennia, but through human ingenuity.

Watch closely as it prepares to engage.

The earth beneath it, once undisturbed, will soon be reshaped. Trenches will emerge where there were none. Foundations will be carved with purpose. This machine, though modest in size, is a master of transformation — turning vision into reality, one bucket at a time.

Note the auger attachment — a specialised adaptation. With it, the creature can bore deep into the soil, creating perfect cylinders in the ground… ideal for posts, piers, and the quiet beginnings of something much larger.

And observe its mobility — mounted upon a trailer, it migrates with ease from site to site, ever ready to work, to build, to reshape the landscape.

A new addition to the fleet… yes.

But more than that — a reliable partner in the wild and unpredictable ecosystem of construction.

And so, as the sun sets on its first day in this habitat, we leave it resting… for tomorrow, it digs.