Grumpy Guy Landscape

01/02/2016

I'm still around

05/24/2015

Quit giving your money to junkies and crackheads on the street and hire grumpyguylandscape...

Most lawns $25. I work on an as needed basis. No contracts. South Toms River to Bayville area. Throw in a six pack of Bud Bottles and I'll do it for $20. Not looking for high end work. If you're...

05/24/2015

Gots my truck back and I'm ready to roll...

Hey kids! This is Grumpy Guy from grumpyguylandscape. I mow lawns and drink beer. Most lawns 20 to 30 bucks. I aints gots no insurance and if your a dick and really picky about your yard, don't...

05/18/2015

Front yard looking like s**t? Need a machete to get to your car in the morning? Grumpyguylandscape is mowing your weeds at a fair price. I ain't gots no insurance, so overhead is low. Beer is always welcome.

05/12/2015

Remember leg wrestling in gym class with the teacher? I always thought it was odd when he'd tell me what a nice set of nuts I had when we were done. Don't get caught with your pants down. And contact grumpyguylandscape for all your landscaping needs...

05/10/2015

Happy Mothers Day to all you moms out there. Especially you lonely single moms. Sitting all alone wishing you had someone to come over and "mow your lawn". Grumpyguylandscape is always available to stop by and see if you need a trimming...

05/03/2015

Grumpyguylandscape has a busted pickup truck. I can't mow lawns right now, but I can drink all your beer and bourbon...

03/17/2015

This guy needs GrumpyGuylandscape! And GrumpyGuylandscape needs a bottle of Ripple...

01/30/2015

Facebook says my audience misses me, so here's an update. THERE'S NO LAWNS TO MOW IN THE WINTER! DUH. Big things are coming up this spring though, so stay posted. And if you un-like my page, I may just jump off a bridge...

12/14/2014

Need some snow shoveled? GrumpyGuylandscape don't do that s**t. Have a Merry X-Mas.

09/19/2014

Some fool from Kansas just called GrumpyGuylandscape to join his network. Damned idiot doesn't realize GrumpyGuylandscape works when he wants, and for who he wants! Keep those LIKES coming and don't forget, GrumpyGuylandscape loves you all...

09/09/2014

GrumpyGuy Landscape says "Sometimes a good crack on the ass is deserved, but what Ray Rice did was way outa line." Be sure to check out GrumpyGuylandscape for all your lawn mowing needs. Unless you're a do**he. Then don't call me at all...