29/10/2026
OFFICIAL NOTICE TO THE TREE IN THE BACKYARD
Dear Tree,
We've enjoyed having you around.
However, we've noticed you've recently started:
- Invading the neighbours' personal space.
- Dropping your belongings all over the lawn.
- Blocking the view.
- Making unwanted advances towards the roof.
We feel it's time to establish some boundaries.
Kind regards,
The Homeowner
P.S. We've called Acclaim Tree Care & Services. Apparently, they're very good at handling difficult relationships.
Professional tree care, with a crew that knows exactly what they're doing.